I’m literally sitting here crying watching a documentary over Annie Leibowitz and it’s killing me because not only do I aspire to be even one tenth of how good she is but it’s currently talking about people in her life dying and it’s making me remember all the photos I didn’t shoot. All the photos of my grandmother before she died. She was always my driving force behind me, always encouraging me to do what I wanted and I miss her so much. I think it’s time to really do what I want to.
“Sometimes I wonder if the paper within a journal ever gets tired of soaking in the ink that spills the same old tired stories where, over the years, the ending stays the same and the only edits made are the old names having their roles stolen by the new players in the script of my life.”
I did my first free writing session in a long, long time and this was something that came from that. I forgot how important this kind of exercise is, and how it always makes me feel … free.
And I told you to be patient, and I told you to be fine. I told you to be balanced, and I told you to be kind, but now all your love is wasted. And then who the hell was I?
So one last touch and then you'll go and we'll pretend that it meant something so much more. But it was vile, and it was cheap and you are beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me. Yeah, you are beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me
But I can't help the feeling I could blow through the ceiling if I just turn and run. And it wears me out... It wears me out. If I could be who you wanted, if I could be who you wanted all the time... all the time.
You are calm and reposed, let your beauty unfold. Pale white like the skin stretched over your bones, spring keeps you ever close. You are secondhand smoke, you are so fragile and thin standing trial for your sins. Holding onto yourself the best you can. You are the smell before rain, you are the blood in my veins.
You a stupid hoe, you a you a stupid hoe. You a stupid hoe, you a you a stupid hoe. You a stupid hoe, you a you a stupid hoe. You a stupid hoe, you a you a stupid hoe. You a stupid hoe, yeah you a you a stupid hoe.You a stupid hoe you a you a stupid hoe. You stupid stupid, you a stupid hoe